Sometimes I feel there is no going back. I cannot quit, revert nor restart. My only way out of this stress, fear, disappointment, pain, heart ache is by moving forward… going through it ALL until it become just a memory stored somewhere in my mind.
Speaking of memories, isn’t it fascinating how our brain takes care of our hard drives? It acts like a maestro orchestrating what to keep in memory and in what form and shape? In case you don’t know, this is a fact; not all memories are faithfully kept: some are altered, modified when stored, or even completely erased. The maestro can even change the order of events that were actually experienced at first hand. Amazing! isn’t it? I always thought I have full control over my mind, but the truth is not really, or not always to say the least.
On the bright side though, this is all for my own sake and I know that. Bad memories, traumas lived can pull you down and can be too much to handle sometimes. There are therefore best forgotten or kept to a certain degree. And so, I fully trust my brain will make a good decision regarding this one too :)